I thank God for the peace that He gives. Last Monday, I went to the school to do some volunteer work. I was watching "my kids" practice for their 6th grade graduation when it seemed like a flood of tears was about to overwhelm me. I decided that it would be best if I went home. There in the privacy of my house, I was able to let them flow. It was amazing to realize that the children who had been "babies" just six years earlier were now ready to become young adults. They didn't need me anymore and that was hard to accept. (Poor Jerry had to put up with my depressed mood for the rest of the day. I don't think he noticed since he was still so sick.)
The next morning, when I started my quiet time with the Lord, I was surprised to find the Holy Spirit waiting for me. He immediately filled me with peace and comfort. I knew that God loves these precious children so much more than I ever could and He reassured me that He was watching out for them. Amen!
I know that many of you do not understand the care, concern, and love that I have for these specific children. I believe that it is a gift that the Lord gave to me. I have always loved children, except for several years when I was so bitter and angry at God for the sorrow He had allowed me to endure. However, when I confessed and forsook those sins, the Lord restored that great ability to love once again. Then, six years ago, God gave me a most wonderful job of working as a para-educator in the same school that I had attended decades earlier. The children that I worked with were in the "normal" classes and I fell in love with all of the students. I was able to work with them from first grade to fifth grade and then was able to volunteer in their classrooms this year. So, I have been with the same students for six years which is half of their lives. The Lord has used me to guide and encourage many of the kids and to even be able to witness to a few of them.
So, on the last day of school, I thought that I would be crying a lot since that would be the last time that I would be with them. (No, I do not plan on volunteering at the junior high.) But, instead, I was full of joy and gratitude. What a blessing it has been to be a part of the lives of so many children and for so many years. I want them to remember me as an adult who cares about them and not a selfish cry-baby. I pray for them and wish them all the very best. And I thank God for all His blessings!