Life can be hard. But I have learned so much along the way. And I am thankful for every moment of it. Thought I would write about something that I have had to deal with since I was eight years old. Depression. Don't do anything, except continue to read this with an open mind.
I can remember my first bout of depression like it was yesterday. My family was on a camping trip to Tillamook, Ore. We were on our way to town and an overwhelming sense of sadness filled my mind. I just wished I could die. I was crying for no reason and my mom had no sympathy for me. (Unknown, at that time, was that my mother also had depression.) Here I was a little, innocent child with feelings that I couldn't understand and couldn't control. All I could do was cry.
Since then I have had to deal with depression. I just never wanted to deal with it, nor to even admit that I had a problem. It was extremely embarrassing to admit that there was anything wrong with my mind. My pride was just as bad as my depression.
It was only a few years ago that I finally realized that mental illness is not a sign of weakness nor is it a sin. I have used prescription medication to help control the overwhelming feelings, but have recently decided to try a more natural approach. The side-effects of the prescription medications were worse than I could handle. So, I am now taking SAM-e, excercising, and realizing that "this too shall pass" when the depression gets bad. Most of the time, I feel fine and that is what I try to remember when I feel overwhelmed.
So, what is the truth that I have learned from the Lord? The greatest thing....that God loves me no matter what I think. I am accepted and loved in Jesus Christ, and that is what God sees when he looks at me. God doesn't see me; he sees his perfect Son. What could be more glorious? I am in him and he in me.