I am so glad that we had our Easter family dinner yesterday. It was nice to have family here and to be able to prepare everything and not have to worry about it during church services. And I thank God that he held off my CFS attack until today. It isn't the greatest way to enjoy Easter Sunday, but this too shall pass.
This is the first time that I have had a full-blown CFS attack since I stopped taking perscription medications for my fibromyalgia. Part of me had hoped that my CFS was connected to the medications, but now I accept the truth. I have CFS (chronic fatigue syndrome) and fibromyalgia. I am on the verge of tears as this is very frustrating and there is nothing I can do to get rid of either disorder.
I know there are those who don't understand nor believe that there are such disorders. But it is real and it is awful. Let me discribe today for you. I woke up feeling just like I had the flu. My throat hurt, I was nauseuos, I ached all over, and I wanted to do was sleep. I ate a piece of toast and went back to bed. I slept for two hours and woke up feeling the same as I did in the morning. I was able to eat a bowl of cereal. Within half an hour, I was back to bed. Again I slept. This time for nearly three hours. My throat and stomach felt better and I was ready to eat some leftovers for dinner. I've been able to stay awake, but am very tired and am just sitting here.
I have to live with the fibromyalgia on a constant basis. There are days when the pain is much worse, but the pain is there all the time. The pain is the worse in my elbows, knees, and right ankle. When it is bad, it hurts everywhere.
Daily exercise on my stationery, recumbent bike, as well as the exercise I get at work, do help me to feel better. I did water aerobics last summer and they helped the most. I wish I could have my own pool here at home. This summer I shall be able to go back to the aerobics class at the pool, but I just can't fit it into my schedule right now. Plus, I am just too worn out in the evening when I am working at the school.
So, what is the truth and blessing in all of this? I know that I am "fearfully and wonderfully made" and that "all things work together for the good of them that love God". Things could always be worse and I am so thankful to the Lord that He is sovereign, almighty, God of love and grace. He has blessed me so very much and I am grateful for CFS and fibromyalgia. These disorders allow me time to rest and spend time focused on the Lord.